“Are you MOM enough?”

How could I not post about this?

Notice this cover says May 21st 2012 in the top right corner. It’s not even out yet right? Yet it’s ALL OVER the internet. This woman – Jamie Lynne Grumet and her THREE YEAR OLD son are automatically known.

I can’t read the article on the TIME’s website cause they want you to pay for a subscription – I won’t even buy the stupid thing to read the article but it has to do with attachment parenting. What is attachment parenting? This is according to Dr. Sears (the guy who is featured in the story). Oh – these are HIS points – and MY observations and what I did/do with Keira.

1. Birth Bonding – I stayed home with Keira for the first three month’s of her life. I hardly ever left her alone and she slept in a cradle by our bed and when she couldn’t or wouldn’t sleep in there she slept ON me in our bed or ON me on the couch. Now she sleeps in her crib in her room and we use a monitor to keep a listen out for her.

2. Breastfeeding – Keira was exclusively breast-fed for three months. Once I started back to work I couldn’t pump enough to keep up my supply of frozen milk. Now – she gets at least one and a half bottles of breast milk and three and a half bottles of formula a day at day care. There is always one extra bottle when I pick her up because I pick her up early unless I have something to do after work. When she comes home she’s breastfed and when we are out she’s breastfed. At church I bring a bottle for the nursery just in case.

3. Baby Wearing – I have a Moby wrap. I’ve used it maybe ten times. Jeremy has used it maybe five times. Keira is very wiggly and I doubt she’d want to be in there. She likes to sit on my hip so a sling carrier would be better for us now and I am looking into getting one that adjusts.

4. Bedding close to baby – See above #1

5. Belief in the language value of your baby’s cry – Those people who say babies cry for attention are stupid. Your baby – up to a certain age – cries because either they are hungry, dirty/wet or tired (at least in Keira’s case – she fought sleep hard for a while). I can tell when she’s “pretending” to fuss and actually fussing and crying. All mom’s should be able to tell the difference (IMO).

6. Beware of Baby Trainers – Or the Cry It Out method. I thought about buying a sleep trainer timer but then I realized – what’s the point? If she wakes up it’s because of something (dirty diaper, hungry, etc.) and never in my life would I let her cry and hollar in her crib. That’s just ridiculous to me.

7. Balance – Dr. Sears says you are supposed to be able to know when to say yes to help and when to say no and how to balance the rest of your life (marriage, other kids, job, etc.)

Do I basically follow was Dr. Sears says? Yes – I guess you could say I do. Do I take it to the EXTREME like Jamie Lynne Grumet? NO. I will try my darndest to nurse Keira until she is a year old. She sleeps in her crib in her room, we do not let her cry it out for any reason. If I had a sling I would wear it to the store, to family outings and anywhere else I needed to. It would give my left shoulder and arm a break and maybe I wouldn’t get sharp numbing stabs every so often any more. The girl wants to be up and see what I see so I let her. She hates to be held sitting down if there is stuff to look up at.

Good for Jamie for having the balls to do what she’s doing. She says she was breastfed until she was six. Good for her mom too. It may not be the right thing for everyone but for her and her son that’s what she thinks is best. I heard her interview from some news channel and she said that he is starting to self wean so this year will more than likely be his last year to nurse.

The title on the cover did piss some people off and understandably. Some mom’s can’t nurse – that’ doesn’t mean they are bad mom’s. Some mom’s – like me – can’t pump enough. I thought I was horrible giving Keira formula (mind you Seth was formula fed because I thought breastfeeding was “gross” when I was 18) but in the end at least I am giving her more of my milk than formula.

Every mom is mom enough. You give your baby the best you can with what you can and that’s all you can ask for. Women are looked down upon for breastfeeding, women are looked down upon for formula feeding. No matter what you do there will always be someone there to try to tear you down. I speak from experience. Do what you think is best for your baby and screw everyone else’s opinions. Here – on this blog – I’ve stated my opinions very openly and honestly. Do I expect you to read them and DO them? No. Do I expect you to get pissed at me for them? No – and I don’t really care if you do. Do I expect you to RESPECT my opinion? Yes and if you’d like we can have a discussion about anything you want. Why one thing is better than the other or why one thing is bad etc. but in the end – it’s my opinion and you’re not going to change my mind and I’m not going to change yours and don’t get pissy at me for it.

So – am I MOM enough? YES – and so are you.

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